Navigating Transitions

Throughout life, humans deal with change. Because we become used to dealing with things in a particular way, sometimes the changes we face change us as people. We have all dealt with unpleasant circumstances, be it poor health, the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, and these instances cause us to think about them in different ways. Our evolution as a species taught us to rely on our experiences and our knowledge of the world to navigate safely to the next stage. Sometimes, though, what has come before has not prepared us to handle the challenge we now face. How is it possible for us to relinquish those things behind us and take up things ahead?

We tend to approach many of these situations with fear, anxiety, and questioning ourselves. At our old job, we knew who we were, and how we fit into the world. When we were healthy, we could do so many things that are now difficult. Faced with these types of situations, we even wonder what our life should look like. Our only reference point is what has already happened, and that is no longer useful in helping us find our next steps. When a loved one dies—husband, wife, parent, friend—we mourn, knowing that our lives are forever changed. With this person no longer with us, we feel the sadness of loss, the feeling of helplessness, the child-like wonder of why this happened, but we also face this hard truth, and find ways to honor the time we had with them, searching for ways to fill the holes we now feel in our lives. And we have changed ourselves.

Perhaps no longer as carefree as we may have been at one time, but wiser, and more able to help others navigating these difficult passages, we move forward. Minute by minute, step by step, day by day, we begin to use the lessons we learned from our old friend, from the job we had, from the experience of healing our bodies and souls in a difficult time. By honoring our ‘golden’ past, and the joy we experienced with people, by doing work we enjoyed, of realizing our mortality, we are able to give it a more realistic, beneficial place in our memories and our lives, able to fully draw on these times to help ourselves and others face adversity and turn it an opportunity for growth. 

No one wants to go through difficult times, but we all face them at some point. We feel alone, as if this is the first time this has ever happened to anyone, and we need to offset the feeling of being the only one in the Universe experiencing what has happened. Now is the time to reach out, to friends, family, and let them know where you are, what you’re feeling, ask questions, and begin the dialogue that will lead to those first steps toward transition. Frightening as it may be, embrace the possibility of change, uncomfortable as it may be, and of saying goodbye to the job, the house, the relationship, or the person. An exit from one thing is always an entrance to another, offering opportunities that were not possible before this transition made them feasible.