It’s always the darkest before the dawn.
This old aphorism is literally true: the dark of the pre-dawn is so very intense, and it makes the first few rays of light on the horizon that much more welcome. Generally though, we use this old phrase to cheer up someone going through a rough time in their life. Job hunting, sick child, a death, and so much more that tries us has humans, and tests us and what we are capable of doing. Going through that blackness—figuratively, in this case—is never easy. And it is particularly difficult over long periods of time; time during which we may feel that there really is no end to this time of trial. We feel our way through the dark, hoping our ‘sunrise’ is nearly upon us.
As we go through this period of time, always scanning the horizon for hints of the coming dawn, it can be really difficult to keep focus, and even more difficult not to dwell on the difficulty itself while searching for solutions. And when solutions, or what we thought were solutions, did not work for us, what then? Albert Einstein once said that his failures were simply another way that did not work as he went about trying to answer questions most of us wouldn’t even think to ask. Sometimes it’s easy to dismiss that philosophy, as Einstein’s work itself was groundbreaking, and we are not searching for universal answers to mind-boggling questions, as he was. His philosophy, however, is correct. Whether you are learning to drive a car, or drive a golf ball, certain things work, and certain things do not. It is the frustration we may feel after yet another failed attempt at something—driving the golf ball straight down the fairway, for example—that can cause us to give up, or challenge us to do something different this time. Was my form correct, or did it waver? This is where, in the golf example, a coach or teacher is so much help, as they are able to see things you cannot see, and can then guide you to a better way to move through the stroke and put the ball in the center of the fairway. All great athletes, whether involved in individual sports like tennis or golf, or participating with others in team sports like football and baseball, have said that without the help of others, they could not have done what they did, and play to the levels at which they play. They recognize that though they may indeed have a unique, astonishing talent for the sport they play, without others in their past, urging them on, keeping them on board with practice, and so forth, that they would not be where they are now, having pushed on in darker times, hoping for that sunrise.
As humans, we are social beings, even we introverts, still need the company, the words, the actions of others to keep moving forward. Even those of us who do our best work in a more solitary environment still need the encouragement, the camaraderie, of our fellow humans to keep us going, to remind us that it’s okay to fail, and to celebrate our victories, however large or small, with us.