Removing the Barriers

Photo: Klimkin/Pixabay

This world is such a huge place. Physically, we are separated from so many people and cultures, and though we learn much about other places, there is only so much we can do to make that more personal and intimate. How many of us go to parties, to school, to work, and are content to interact only with those with whom we have some commonality, some similarity, that makes the connection a bit more personal? Most of us at times. But what about all of those other people we simply do not know? How many friends have we not made, only to meet these same people later in life and find so much in common? And how much friendship, pleasure, and fellowship have we passed by because we were content to know what we already know, and not reach out to learn more?

In light of this, it is interesting to think of the business convention, with people from all over the country, or perhaps around the world, in attendance, and we choose to sit with and interact with those we already know. We are all in attendance, dressed professionally, some of us are scheduled to speak to larger groups, and we are all wearing a paper name tag that says, ‘Hi! My name is _______.’ We see people, we read their name on the tag, and then return to our group, our ‘safe’ space. Yet, in every one of these situations, there are a few people who step out of their comfort zone, and say, ‘Hi Robert. My name is Mary. It’s nice to meet you.’ A conversation follows where we learn where they live, what their life is like, are they married or single, are there children in their lives, and so much else. And all of a sudden, we know someone new. Just like that. We have, in a minute or two, turned into actual human beings, instead of strangers studying the landscape, trying to decide what we can and cannot do in this particular situation.

One similar situation that happened in my own life landed me a friend, that, though I have not seen her now for over twenty years, I know the minute we meet again, we will converse and rejoice in each other’s company as if there had not been such a long expanse of time between our meetings, as if we had seen each other last week, and the knowledge and intimacy of our friendship will only be strengthened. Because one of us reached out, said ‘Hello’ or similar, and the words began to flow, leading us to know one another better, and as our time together passed—far too quickly—we forged a bond that still exists. We have been in contact since, through relationships, a marriage for each of us, and a comparison of our lives and how they have changed since we first met, living across the hall from one another, at an ancient school, in another country, so many years ago, and we put our hands out, said ‘Hi!’ and found a barrier removed. This type of thing not only removes barriers, it allows us to truly be who we are, truly and honestly, and to allow someone else into our lives that makes a real difference in our words and thoughts.

Breaking through those fences, removing the barriers, being ourselves, and letting others be their true selves as well, is the start of friendship, of love, and of respect. Not only for others, but for ourselves as well. And it all begins with laying aside the fear of being judged, of not being liked, and of taking the chance that we have greeted a person who will not only reciprocate, but will change how we think and move through life.